Leading a Tribe

Seth Godin is looking for leaders. In his latest book, “Tribes,” Seth claims there’s a “vast shortage of leaders” at a time when it’s never been easier for people who want to make a difference to do so. To become a tribe leader, “all you need to do is motivate people who choose to follow you.”

Cool. So I’m seeing massive opportunity in front of me and for you too. What are you passionate about? Find others who are passionate about the same thing and lead them in creating change, in making a difference in the world. It’s human nature to want to belong, to fit in. And right now, with the Internet and social media, it’s easier than ever to find others who will join you in whatever quest you’re on.

Personally, I’m building a tribe to change how people relate to each other in business and personal life. I’m building a tribe that understands the importance of sharing gratitude, of appreciation marketing, of recognizing the contributions of others to their success. Not everyone will want to be in my tribe, nor is everyone is even qualified to join. But for those who do and who are, we will impact the lives of millions by creating stronger relationships and helping others feel valued.

What tribe are you leading?

Employee Appreciation Time

Now is a good time to remember and appreciate the employees who are working so hard for your company’s success. It’s the time of year when school’s out and any holidays that generate good will and celebration are few and far between. This year, many companies are asking fewer employees to make do with less resources. Which is why it’s the perfect time to show some gratitude for your people.

I just read an article about businesses in New England using food to reward employees. The article itself wasn’t all that great, so I won’t provide you with a link. But there was a quote in it from Paul Baard, a communications professor at Fordham University who researches workplace motivation. He said, food “appeals to our need for relatedness.”

Yes, people need to feel connected. They need to feel part of a community. They need to know that what they are doing day in and day out on behalf of your company is relevant.

Giving food gifts, or “breaking bread” with others, has always been an important and personal form of recognition. It offers a level of genuine connection that cannot be achieved through any other means. So make an investment in the well being of your employees (and your company overall) and show some gratitude.

Who’s Got Your Back

Just spent 3 days in a cave. Okay, not really a cave, but in my Sacred Circle Mastermind. Fourteen business owners meet with our coach and mentor Fabienne Fredrickson three times a year. When we’re all together, there’s not a lot of contact with the outside world. The easy explanation for what we do there is that it’s three days working on strategic aspects of our businesses. It’s actually much more. We are a group of entrepreneurs that is playing really big, taking action and stepping up our game.

It’s called the Sacred Circle because what happens in this space, among these people is magical. We’ve created deep and trusting relationships with each other in a way that isn’t at all that common in the “real world.” Inside our circle, we can be vulnerable and open. We talk about where we’re stuck, or what’s scaring the crap out of us. We see in each other the huge potential that we don’t see in ourselves. We call each other out on the stuff that’s holding us back and getting in the way of our success. What’s shared in these meetings stays within the Circle.

One thing I can share with you from this meeting is that Keith Ferrazzi’s new book, “Who’s Got Your Back” came up in discussion because it’s about relationships just like what we’ve created in our Sacred Circle. Keith says “the real path to success in your career and in your personal life is through creating an inner circle of “lifeline relationships” – deep, close relationships with a few key trusted individuals who will offer the encouragement, feedback, and generous mutual support that every one of us needs to reach our full potential.”

So I leave Stamford, Connecticut this weekend tired and energized at the same time; grateful that I have this trusted family; knowing that just like anyone else who’s ever achieved greatness, I’ve got an amazing team on this journey with me.

What Need Do You Fill?

The sole reason a business exists is because it meets a human need. ~Harvey Firestone

I saw this quote over the weekend and it got me to thinking, again, about what human need a box of cookies fulfills. Yes, we’ve been over this before. That Gratitude Cookies are not so much about the cookie part and much more about the concept of gratitude.

Is feeling gratitude an actual need? It’s not specifically on Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, but friendship, giving and receiving love, and recognition are on his chart. Feeling connected to others is certainly a human need. And expressing appreciation is one important way to connect.

Keith Ferrazzi was on Good Morning America today, promoting his new book “Who’s Got Your Back” and his 16-city road show. He said that 75% of Americans don’t feel that someone’s got their back; not even married couples. Wow, that’s a lot of disconnected people. Furthermore, he says that the most important thing you can do to succeed is to build deep and trusting relationships.

So then, if you could create stronger connections in your personal or profession life and satisfy that need in yourself and for others, why wouldn’t you? You have a great opportunity here! No matter what other human need your business exists to fulfill, you can improve your business by addressing this one of connection and recognition through gratitude.

Some Customers Are More Equal Than Others

A friend recommended I speak with his college roommate, Sam*, about how Sam’s company handles customer appreciation. By all outside perceptions, Sam’s company fell exactly within the demographics of an ideal Zen Rabbit client.

But after just a couple of minutes on the phone, it was clear that Sam is currently working in contraction and fear mode, you know, because of the economy. Futhermore, Sam didn’t seem to understand the lifetime value of his clients.

I pointed out to him that even though he said he has thousands of clients, he’s likely getting 80% of his business from 20% of them. He agreed. Then I mentioned that he should be focusing his efforts on keeping those 20% really happy. That’s where he got a little fuzzy. Even though he “knows that,” he still wants to keep ALL his clients happy and not play favorites.

Hey, I can understand wanting to keep everyone happy, but like in the classic book “Animal Farm,” some customers are more equal than others. That’s just how it is. Some clients are more valuable than others. And you would do well to focus on and cater more to those 20% who bring you the most valuable business.

Sam admitted that he does not have a plan for consistently showing appreciation for his best customers. But he doesn’t quite believe that it would be worth the effort. I got the impression that he prefers to “fly by the seat of his pants” in that regard. It depends on whether there is money left over for it at the end of the month. It’s an afterthought.

But what if Sam DID believe in the power of saying thank you to his clients? What could his business look like then? I know for sure that his company would be a lot stronger, that he wouldn’t be so afraid of what’s going on in “the economy.” That he wouldn’t have to compete on price. Too bad Sam’s not ready for that message yet. Are you?

*names have been changed to protect friendships.

Quick Change in Perspective

I just left Starbucks, where I was to meet with a new business contact. In South Florida, there seems to always be a traffic delay somewhere, so I usually give people 10 minutes before I call to find out where they are. Coming up on the 9-1/2 minute mark, my phone rang. It was the person I was to meet and she asked if I was there. I knew right away she was going to say she wasn’t coming; I was mentally preparing for some kind of lame excuse, since that’s what usually comes next.

I was not prepared for her to say her dad died on Sunday and she’s in Chicago. Immediately my perspective changed from “doesn’t this person respect my time” to “holy cow, don’t even worry about not meeting with me you have so many more important things to do”! I’m surprised and grateful she even thought to call me – she said she doesn’t know why our meeting just popped into her head right then.

One of my mentors told me a story years ago, about some rowdy kids on the subway early one morning. The man riding with them was doing nothing to control their behavior and a fellow rider was becoming increasingly annoyed. After a while, the fellow rider finally caught the man’s attention. The man quickly apologized for his children’s activity and explained that they’d all spent the night at the hospital where their mother had just died. The kids were full of anxious, fidgety energy.

Talk about a turnaround in perspective.

It only takes an instant to change your perspective. So whether it’s from annoyance to compassion or from frustration to gratitude, see if you can find what serves your higher good in every situation.

Can’t believe I’m writing this

I had a strategy call with my coach and mentor this morning. Fabienne always speaks her truth, what she’s seeing or feeling, and sometimes it’s hard to hear. She always asks permission before sharing, and really, who wouldn’t want to hear what could be a great revelation? Still, even when you know it’s for your own good, it can sting. So what she called me out for is not living in gratitude.

Deep breath here.

My business is all about gratitude, saying thank you, showing appreciation in your business and personal life. The Gratitude Cookie™. Hello?!

But I’m not personally living in gratitude. I have my moments for sure. And then there’s the rest of the time. The time I spend wondering where the money is. Where are more clients? Why do I not have a multi-million dollar business yet?

Rachael Ray featured Zen Crunch as Snack of the Day on her talk show last month. Everyone who knows about that thinks it’s an incredible achievement! My gratitude for that lasted about five minutes before I was looking for the next opportunity.

Nothing has been enough and I always need more.

So I haven’t been living authentically. That’s why everything has been so hard. Are you laughing at me, or does this resonate with you too?

Fabienne and I talked about how I can change that – continuing my meditations and working out at the gym, and journaling more consistently. There are some other changes I’m making too, that I’ll share in time.

Right now, I’m committing to live in gratitude for everything, even when it feels foreign. Care to join me in the adventure?

You Never Know Who’s Listening

Last week on my trip back from California to Florida, I ran into a colleague from my Execs’ Association in the Atlanta airport. He was returning from Austin and we were on the same flight to West Palm. It was funny because last year a similar thing happened in Dallas with another Execs’ colleague. And on my flight out to LA two weeks ago, I sat next to someone who ended up being at the same workshop I was attending. And then at lunch one day, I was talking about Nikki Incandela with my lunch partner, only to turn around and see Nikki sitting at the table behind me. She said she hadn’t heard me, but no matter because I was saying good things about her!

I find it fascinating how the universe arranges things. You never know who’s around you and who’s listening to your conversations. Which is exactly why it’s so important to make sure you wouldn’t mind being overheard or having the person you might be talking about hear whatever you’re saying. Goes back to that quote your grandmother may have said about “if you don’t have something nice to say…”

This whole idea fits right in with what my friend and mentor Bob Burg promotes all the time. And it’s no wonder that in return, I’ve only heard raving praise for Bob from others.

So this week, think about who might be hearing your offline conversations or seeing your online ones and remember to only say what you wouldn’t mind hearing repeated somewhere.

Grateful for Twitter Connections

Last week I had a great phone conversation with Deanna Collins, creator of The Gratitude Collection. We found each other on Twitter and thought that with The Gratitude Cookie™ and The Gratitude Collection, we must connect.

Deanna’s Gratitude Collection is a collection of bracelets, necklaces and earrings that were created to “help the wearers make a conscious effort to recognize the gifts in their lives.”

She told me that she made the very first Gratitude Bracelet, the one that has now become the essential element of the Signature Collection, for a friend as a gift to comfort her through a difficult time. (see that whole story here.)

Word got around and more and more people began asking her to make the bracelets for them. Next thing you know, she had a business and expanded the jewelry line into necklaces and earrings as well.

Today the solitary bead in her Signature Collection is an authentic hand-sculpted bead from the Mount Kenya region of Africa, hand-crafted by local Kenyan women. Very cool.

Also on the Gratitude Collections web site are some wonderful quotes on gratitude. Check them out here.

With our common connections and philosophies, Deanna and I are discussing how to combine our efforts to share the important message of Gratitude. I’ll keep you posted on the new developments. Or follow us on Twitter (twitter.com/ZenRabbit and twitter.com/GratitudeCircle) to get the continuing updates.

How’d You Get on Rachael Ray?

Ever since I announced that Zen Crunch was chosen to be Snack of the Day on Rachael Ray’s daytime talk show, people have been asking me how I did it. It’s not a big secret and I’m happy to share a bit of the behind the scenes.

Back in January, my fab PR expert Sara Becker got the name of the Snack of the Day segment producer and I sent her a letter along with a box of Gratitude Cookies. I’m good at sending stuff out, and not so good at follow up later. That’s why I’m so grateful to have Sara. She called and emailed the producer to find out if she got the box, if she liked the cookies, if she thought they were a good fit for Snack of the Day, etc.

She did like The Gratitude Cookie™, but felt they’d been giving away too many cookies recently and preferred to diversify.

No worries, Zen Rabbit also has Zen Crunch! So I sent another letter along with a couple bags of Zen Crunch. Once again, Sara was on top of the follow through and two weeks later we got word from the producer that YES! Zen Crunch would be included as a Snack of the Day in taping the following week. Now, she asked, could we overnight 160 bags of Crunch to New York for distribution to one studio audience?

Um, yeah, I think we could do that!!! I did, they taped the show and another two weeks later it aired.

So simple. Like most things in life, it really comes down to follow up and persistence. Okay, and maybe finding the right person to contact.

PS: Did you miss the show? See the local news coverage, which includes the Snack of the Day clip here: http://www.tinyurl.com/wptv324